Anime Boston

A few of the other topics made me think to post this one.

Why do people at Anime Boston and other cons think it is okay to go up and touch people they do not know? it is not just glomping, but that is the major issue. I have also had people, when i was cosplaying in previous years, just grab my costume to get my attention or start touching my hair to ask if it i real. My best friend cosplayed as Sydney Losstarot from Vagrant Story last year, and he has the real tattoo. I can't even count the number of people who would come up and start rubbing it to see if it was real. Good thing it was, or else they would have just RUINED an intricate design that would have taken a very long time to paint.

This year, I have a mohawk, and it was a real problem this year (OVER TWENTY PEOPLE) tried touching my head without asking. Not even mentioning the attempted "glomps" and such.

I think that there is nothing wrong with hugging someone if you ask first. And for anyone who asked me, pretty much, I am sure you recall getting either a handshake or a polite decline. It is not that I am unfriendly, I love meeting new people (as anyone venturing near my booth at Artist's Alley can attest). But I am very picky about my personal space and about who touches me. I don't understand how it has become common mentality that it is okay to just touch anyone you like at conventions. People work very hard on their costumes, and I am sure many are very happy to have you touch and examine them. With permission. But as I have seen in other threads and comments, many people who were glomped or grabbed have found their hard work destroyed.

Example: I would have cosplayed Princess Tutu again this year (I was in Cosplay Chess 2006) except that someone tackled me afterwards and shattered my necklace and crown, as they were made of clay. And maybe it's just me, but I was angry enough to not feel like re-making them, only to probably have it happen again. Also I had many people tugging on my *real* orange hair to compliment my wig.

This wasn't trying to rag on anyone in particular, just hoping to get a dialogue going on the subject, as truly I want to understand.

I hear ya. I was outside smoking this year (in costume) and got mega-glomped from behind, and my cigarette burned a good-sized hole in my glove.

Granted, they were only 10 bucks, but I had just bought them to replace the pair I had lost.

Not to mention getting jumped on from behind unexpectedly is a bit rattling.

Younger otaku are incredibly insecure people who are so desperate for physical contact that they'll practically attack anyone who seems remotely willing to reciprocate. For future years I suggest keeping a spray bottle filled with 1 part vinegar and 3 parts water, or whatever you're supposed to use to housetrain puppies. Should do the trick.

[quote=dokool]Younger otaku are incredibly insecure people who are so desperate for physical contact that they'll practically attack anyone who seems remotely willing to reciprocate. For future years I suggest keeping a spray bottle filled with 1 part vinegar and 3 parts water, or whatever you're supposed to use to housetrain puppies. Should do the trick.[/quote]


I have an idea: Carry around empty anime DVD cases and toss them away from you to distract them. By the time they figure out there's no free anime to be had, you've made your escape.

[quote=Javapsycho][quote=dokool]Younger otaku are incredibly insecure people who are so desperate for physical contact that they'll practically attack anyone who seems remotely willing to reciprocate. For future years I suggest keeping a spray bottle filled with 1 part vinegar and 3 parts water, or whatever you're supposed to use to housetrain puppies. Should do the trick.[/quote]


I have an idea: Carry around empty anime DVD cases and toss them away from you to distract them. By the time they figure out there's no free anime to be had, you've made your escape.
[/quote]

I'm not even kidding, I had pocky on me to give out as a distraction. I gave the leftovers away in Artist's Alley on sunday and it was a MOB SCENE.

I've yet to be glomped...perhaps I don't look friendly enough to do so? This year I just got one polite request for a hug, which I obliged. I don't mind hug requests at all, if I'm in the right mood.

But glomps...I'd only do that to my closest friends, if that.

Yeah, I'm all for meeting new people as well. However, I was joking around in the game room asking for change ala the South Park episode last week as a joke. Then all of a sudden this young otaku all of a sudden just goes and squeezes my nipple. I'm a very reserved person when it comes to touching as well, and I don't just go around and squeeze the nipple of people I don't know. Like people in the DDR community that I know, I'll hug and stuff like that because I know them, and other people in the con as well, but some random girl squeezing the nips...I dunno, violates my personal space a bit too much.

[quote=punkstara]
I'm not even kidding, I had pocky on me to give out as a distraction. I gave the leftovers away in Artist's Alley on sunday and it was a MOB SCENE.[/quote]


Well, you know congoers, they loves them some pocky =P

[quote=lunchbox]Yeah, I'm all for meeting new people as well. However, I was joking around in the game room asking for change ala the South Park episode last week as a joke. Then all of a sudden this young otaku all of a sudden just goes and squeezes my nipple. I'm a very reserved person when it comes to touching as well, and I don't just go around and squeeze the nipple of people I don't know. Like people in the DDR community that I know, I'll hug and stuff like that because I know them, and other people in the con as well, but some random girl squeezing the nips...I dunno, violates my personal space a bit too much. [/quote]


That's a little...um...awkward... 0.o

What do you say to that?

"Um, excuse me, mind not touching my nipples please?"

[quote=lunchbox]Yeah, I'm all for meeting new people as well. However, I was joking around in the game room asking for change ala the South Park episode last week as a joke. Then all of a sudden this young otaku all of a sudden just goes and squeezes my nipple. I'm a very reserved person when it comes to touching as well, and I don't just go around and squeeze the nipple of people I don't know. Like people in the DDR community that I know, I'll hug and stuff like that because I know them, and other people in the con as well, but some random girl squeezing the nips...I dunno, violates my personal space a bit too much. [/quote]

See now for that, I would have gone to security.

Well, I knew most of the staff in the game room and some of the security, so they might have just laughed when they heard it. I just think some of these younger con goers need to get control of their sexual energies a bit, because its good to express it sometimes, it keeps you sane to a degree but...random strangers? I'm 19...so most of them are jail bait for me anyway, so its not like I'm gonna do anything with them.

[quote=lunchbox]Well, I knew most of the staff in the game room and some of the security, so they might have just laughed when they heard it. I just think some of these younger con goers need to get control of their sexual energies a bit, because its good to express it sometimes, it keeps you sane to a degree but...random strangers? I'm 19...so most of them are jail bait for me anyway, so its not like I'm gonna do anything with them.[/quote]

Regardless, I don't think a con is the place to express sexual energies. All the making out in the halls for hugs/pics/etc kinda made me uncomfortable...I have nothing against Yaoi/Yuri/Whatever, but I mean...come on, is a convention hall really the place for it? Especially since I don't think a lot of these kids really knew eachother...

[quote=eidna]
Regardless, I don't think a con is the place to express sexual energies. All the making out in the halls for hugs/pics/etc kinda made me uncomfortable...I have nothing against Yaoi/Yuri/Whatever, but I mean...come on, is a convention hall really the place for it? Especially since I don't think a lot of these kids really knew eachother...[/quote]

I agree. Man, I must sound like a total party pooper. I just really find it inappropriate for people to be making out in the halls, for pictures. This is a public event, and many people brought younger children. Now, believe me when I say I am no prude and I am all for teaching children about all sexualities. But is an anime convention really the time or place for it? No. And that isn't fair to parents when their little Naruto walks down a hall towards a panel and there is Sasuke and Gaara getting it on.

Egads.

Well...the making out is a whole other category. I think thats something for private completely. We were trying to hold a Mario kart DS tourny and literally 2 feet from us there was 2 people making out on the same balcony. We asked them to leave but they completely ignored us and just kept going at it. The tournament runner was trying to make sure it went smoothly/ no cheating so he couldn't really stop it. But in reality, there isn't anything we can do to stop em unless they make a rule saying making out and feeling each other up in a room plz k thnx. And making out just for a picture....yeah....please, for other people's sake..don't. Well, some of these kids doing this were with their parents but they let them off on their own. Unless you're talking about like the 6 or 7 year old kids, in which in that case, yeah, I understand what you mean, these kids shouldn't be subject to that in the hallways.

Sorry for double post but, no, I don't think you're a party pooper at all. I think you're reaction is natural for anyone that has maturity and stuff.

I totally agree with pinkstara!

Glomping should be against the rules of the convention and made clear to everyone.

Some costumes are extremely fragile and its so easy to ruin a great costume.

People last year ran up to me so many times and grabbed my ears. My ears are made of latex and were very expensive. They are a rare kind thats not seen very much so everyone wants to touch them. Not to mention they are glued on to my real ears..and if the glue becomes undone they will keep falling off.

Also people kept grabbing my sword blade. My sword blade is covered in a type of vynl that is very picky. When touched it gets all wrinkley looking. People just kept grabbing at it creating more and more wrinkles.

I dont mind the requests for hugs as long as im in control. But running up and touching people is a NO NO!!!!!

Please respect the people who make these great costumes for everyoens enjoyment.

-Linker83

I've found I've never had a problem with this - not because it doesn't happen, but because I suppose my taste for playing as way more obscure characters keeps people from identifying me, much less wanting to run up and hug me out of nowhere.

I know there's a con etiquette panel, but perhaps it might cut down on these kinds of incidents if in the schedule handout everyone gets (Which gets checked usually far more than the booklet) that a few rules are thrown in there close to the schedules, like, of course, no sudden unexpected hugging plzkthx.

I have no problem with glomping as long as I see you coming and have enough time to stop you if my costume is fragile or something. I got blindsided 3 times this year, and the first one almost ripped my skin tight Wrath pants, almost resulting in a wadrobe malfunction. Thank God I sewed those seams extra strong.

But yeah, I don't want to kill the enthusiasm of someone wanting to glomp me, but at the same time, I need to see it coming for my own well being and the protection of my costume.

Yeah, getting glomped is not a problem as long as you see it coming/have time to prepare for it. As said in other topics I was glomped from behind numerous times, and almost fell flat on my face because I either tripped on my coat or was holding my jackal gun and was off balance.

I dont even want to be glomped if I can see it coming...there just isnt enough time to protect yourself.

The person needs to stop, ask if its ok...and continue if allowed. That to me is the right way to do it...and i never deny a fan a hug if they ask.

But I think there actually is a rule about not glomping people unless you ask first. It's just that not everyone obeys it. And that's a problem that I don't think would be particularly easy to resolve. Unless security starts watching us all like high school hall monitors, which I personally would find rather irritating, it's hard to enforce the no-attacking-people-without-their-permission rule.

*~D~*

Assault is assault is assault. There are 4 options to deal with this:

1) Ask (kindly/indignantly/etc.) for people to stop. [Great... except it's a different person next time]
2) Tell security about it. [LOL, I crack myself up sometimes]
3) Respond with a good right hook. [You touch me, I touch back, just harder]
4) Bodyguards. [They can preform tasks 1 through 3 based on your mood]

I'm surprised that with this being such an issue, they're aren't any ambulance-chaser lawyers setting up shop in the dealers room. Are assault cases not great moneymakers?

[quote=BasharOfTheAges]Assault is assault is assault. There are 4 options to deal with this:

1) Ask (kindly/indignantly/etc.) for people to stop. [Great... except it's a different person next time]
2) Tell security about it. [LOL, I crack myself up sometimes]
3) Respond with a good right hook. [You touch me, I touch back, just harder]
4) Bodyguards. [They can preform tasks 1 through 3 based on your mood]

I'm surprised that with this being such an issue, they're aren't any ambulance-chaser lawyers setting up shop in the dealers room. Are assault cases not great moneymakers?[/quote]

I think if I right-hook some 13yearold in cat ears, I shall find myself in the position of in trouble with the law.

Besides glomping, I saw a number of other con-goers blatently ignoring the rules that have been said time and time again. Specifcally the DDG games, and then Sat and Sun all the attention-seeking youngins carrying signs for free hugs and glomps. Not to mention signs in the hotel windows, cutting in line to events, etc.

It seems that some people just don't believe there will be any consequences if they break the rules.

punkstara, you are not a party pooper. we have rules against unsolicited physical contact in our convention policies, which we try to make as conspicuous as possible. of course, not everyone reads these policies (i do, because i'm a freak), and we can't catch every offense, but we can hope that common sense would dictate what is and isn't acceptable.

now, obviously with some of these kids coming from different social circles, certain things that they think are no big deal are obviously going to rub other people the wrong way. their line of thinking is probably, "oh hey, these people have the same interest as me, so it's like they're ALL my friends!!" now that's definitely not the case, and they need to learn boundaries one way or the other. if their friends aren't containing them (which they're not), i think it's up to each of us to say to anyone who does this, "look, it's not okay for you to jump on me like that, and it's not really okay for you to do it to other people. it catches them off guard, it can ruin part of their costume, and you're a COMPLETE STRANGER!" it's okay for you to say that to them, and hopefully they have enough of a brain to listen.

as for the person who had their NIPPLE grabbed? report that to security. don't hesitate. let them know you're not comfortable with that, and we'll take the appropriate course of action. as we're all anime fans, yes, we're here to have fun and hang out, but those of us with staff duties are also here to keep things comfortable for everyone.

that was a little long-winded. i hope it makes sense to everyone.

[quote=BasharOfTheAges]Assault is assault is assault. There are 4 options to deal with this:

1) Ask (kindly/indignantly/etc.) for people to stop. [Great... except it's a different person next time]
2) Tell security about it. [LOL, I crack myself up sometimes]
3) Respond with a good right hook. [You touch me, I touch back, just harder]
4) Bodyguards. [They can preform tasks 1 through 3 based on your mood]

I'm surprised that with this being such an issue, they're aren't any ambulance-chaser lawyers setting up shop in the dealers room. Are assault cases not great moneymakers?[/quote]
I acted as a body guard a few times for the Blood Seras Vic. so her Gun and Armpiece wouldn't get destroyed by people.

I also have an issue with glomping. I find being touched when unprepared to be very upsetting -- in fact, it's quite likely to send me into a panic attack. I wish more people would respect others' personal space and ask before grabbing, tackling, hugging, petting, or otherwise coming in contact with strangers.

I know that most of the glompers are just excited and want to spread their joy. They think they are being friendly and kind. But what would be friendlier and kinder is to respect the wishes of others. Just ask! If someone is OK with glomping, they'll say yes! And those who aren't OK with glomping will think much more of you for having been polite enough to check first.

I was only glomped once this con, thankfully. My costume isn't overly delicate, but I still turned a shoulder into it to avoid any potential damage. Thankfully I noticed them starting to run at me and had time to react.

If a person must glomp, they need to ask first. It is not appropriate at all to just attack someone like that.

I don't understand why people think it's okay to just tackle someone. It's common sense. If people don't like being hurt and flattened in real life, which should being in a con make a difference?

At least I always thought it was common sense. Even when I was 15 (not YOUNG, per se, but young enough for stupidity) and came to my first con knowing absolutely nothing, it never occurred to me not to ask permission for hugs and pictures.

I was pretty lucky in the sense that my costume was sturdy and that I interacted with people who had the good sense to ask my permission.

I went to a psychological conference once where a visiting professor had studied personal space requirements of people in different parts of the US. The midwest was first, but New England came in a very, very close second. Yankees like their space, thanks.

When it comes to touching someone I don't know, I consider it much like touching an unfamiliar dog. You would never walk up to that huge mastiff or german shepard and grab its ears. You would ask (the owner) politely if the dog liked being touched, and then you would approach it carefully, and be prepared to withdraw at the first sign of trouble.

You know what I don't get? People touching pregnant women. What the HECK? You walk up to some woman and touch her BELLY? This... Would never occur to me.

[quote=lunchbox]Yeah, I'm all for meeting new people as well. However, I was joking around in the game room asking for change ala the South Park episode last week as a joke. Then all of a sudden this young otaku all of a sudden just goes and squeezes my nipple. I'm a very reserved person when it comes to touching as well, and I don't just go around and squeeze the nipple of people I don't know. Like people in the DDR community that I know, I'll hug and stuff like that because I know them, and other people in the con as well, but some random girl squeezing the nips...I dunno, violates my personal space a bit too much. [/quote]

Wow. Not only would that kid be dead on the floor by the time I'd be through with him, but I would call security.. Not to mention that's also sexual harrasement. Seriously... Glomps can be alright if your prepared, but grabbing someone's nipples is quite.. revolting. Just my 2 cents.

Just cosplay a sea urchin with real poison spikes. Then see who wants to glomp you.

Sounds like a plan.

Funny how the people who don't want to be glomped are the ones who get glomped and I walk around with a "glomp me" pin and don't get glomped once...

I did get a hug from this kid who was giving out free hugs and of course I got hugs from all my friends (old and new).

I didn't glomp anyone because my dress was really short and I knew it would go flying up if I were to try. I would have only glomp people that had a "glomp me" pin or shirt on. That and maybe some of my friends partly because I love them and partly because it would be a great way to get payback for all the times the sneak up behind me at school and either hug, tickle, or pinch me and thus make me practically drop all my stuff.

But hey I understand that people don't like being glomped.
I can get really awkward when people of the opposite sex (that I don't know are gay) touch me.
That is why I always beat up my friend Zack at lunch (with help from my friend Karah of course)...because he constantly tries to grope me...and every other girl he can get his hands on...as well as some of the guys...he is basically known by the majority of the school as the redheaded pervert. I'm still friends with him because I was friends with him before he got like this...and someone needs to drag him away from his victims and beat some sense into him
Basically if your female and/or asian and going to Connecticon(he couldn't go to AB) be careful and feel free to beat him with a stick. Last year a girl's boyfriend drop-kicked him and it is now his favorite convention story.

This was my first con ever, and I remember asking everyone (at least I'm pretty positive I did...I've no good short term memory whatsoever), if I could glomp them or hug them before I did so.

*pout*

Then again, I also remember reading the "ASK BEFORE GLOMPING" thing on the forums. Plus, there were some costumes that I wouldn't even bother asking for glomps, because I am one of the people that glomp. The jump/run/thing/glomp.

And punkstra, totally not a party pooper. I had some delicate wings for both my costumes, as well as ears that flopped around on a top hat. I can so understand where your coming from. Especially if one's costume can be a hazard to others. [x_x Like the wire frame poking out of said ears]

But people should definitely respect others spaces, so I 100% agree with you.

Luckily all I got this convention were people asking for hugs... I have a thing about personal space, and if someone had tackle-hugged me, I would have probably punched them by instinct. (I did that to my dad accidentally once. It was funnier after the fact.)

That really sucks about your PT stuff getting broken, too. I was part of a group for that series this year, what a coincidence.

I don't mind as long as they ask first. After the skit I remember a lot of people coming up in the hallways for a hug, they all asked or were friends from school XD

[quote=Mewohkie]Just cosplay a sea urchin with real poison spikes. Then see who wants to glomp you.[/quote]

LMAO omg that'd be awesome!! But I do agree with everyone here, the glomping at the convention this year was rediculouse. I had no problem personally, everyone that hugged me either asked or just held out their arms as I was approaching them from a 20foot distance. That way I knew what they wanted and saw it coming at the same time. There is a rule that states you must ask the person you want to hug if it's alright with them first. But some people do go overboard with it. Last year I was dressed as Sesshomaru and this girl hugged me to the point she started to pull my wig off. Plus she wouldn't let go!!

So people really need to control themselves when they see their favorite characters. Because I'm sure I speak for everyone when I say I don't want to have to be stuck at the repair station all day or at all if possible!

I personally don't like being jumped from behind by anyone. Asking me for a hug is one thing that I really dont mind but sometimes it's hard to tell them that this isn't something I want. I was once glomped and they totally ruined my cosplay weapon and parts of my costume because they were overly rough.

Because of the environment, some con-goers act how ever the hell they feel like ([color:red]mum and dad aren't watching[/color]).
Luckily, I think some glomp-ers feared injury from the pointy corners on my domokun suit. I can give hugs; I just don't want to be tackled.

Fragile costume? Not this year. coming in chainmail.

In my case I don't blame people as much because of the nature of my costume. And yes I agree, no one should be glomped or even hugged without asking. A lot of people did ask me so I was fine with it and everything, but yeah the people who just jump out of no where just scare the poopy out of me! I didn't exactly have good visibility either so it was hard to see it coming unless they were right in front of me. The whole fragile costume thing too, people pulled at my ears and tail and were even smacking the head of my costume. Someone actually tried to rip my head off too! Now that's just going out of hand, I made my entire costume by hand, I even hand sewed everything. I know that some people may not have realized how delicate some costumes are, but we need to somehow put out a notice of some sort so they know to be careful and respect people's personal space. And yes I agree with the body guard thing, I always had at least one of my friends and even my mom at one point walk around with me. ^-^

I've never been glomped yet (Thankfully). I was hugged a lot this year, and got a few during 06, but that's about it, and they asked if they could hug me so...yeah.

I tend to be extremely sensitive to touch, so if I unexpectedly get tackled, I get sent into a near-panic attack. Some people just don't seem to think that other people may have a problem with physical contact or even be slightly paranoid. If some random stranger randomly tackled me, I'd either think they were going to kidnap me or go into convulsions because of my touch nerves.
I'm glad that everybody that hugged me asked first, or that I was at least expecting it. You can at least show enthusiasm while asking for a hug. There's no reason to leap at somebody just because they're your favorite character.

And I completely agree with the touching.
Nipple pinching = AHH!! Sexual harassment!!
Grabbing ears = *covers ears and runs* AHH!!
Pulling hair = ow, ow, STOP!
Compliments are fine, but not if you touch first, ask never.

At times when i was Auron i got glomped a few times but only asked prior to glompage. I have a hint tho. If you hear a loud yell, beware of glompage. that... or another precaution is to be in a group so that the intimidation factor gets put into account.

Ah. Now I understand why so many otaku fear furries.

It's cause furries are expert glompers. ^_^
In fact, I believe the term glomp was created by furries.

I have yet to glomp or be glomped.
And I have yet to try and hug a cosplayer, mainly due to fact that I know I could break their costume. (I've always been a squeezer.)

personal boundry issues, god... ther eis so much to say...
i will only tackle hug someone if i either now them, or i get permission.
i didnt get many glomps on the first day, cuz i had a cane and would fall over, lol. but then once i was raver gaara, i got so many glomps. i loved it cuz i dont get that kind of attention in real life, but i saw others get EXTREMELY uncomfortable.

the touching thing can be difficult for pplz with ADD/ADHD because you see something and you want to touch it and for most people there is no thought to it such as, will this person get offended, could i break something, etc. i know they shouldnt, but some people honest to god cant help it. most with add/adhd will apologize saying add/adhd made them do it. I have ADHD and this happened to me alot, my friend was there to make sure that i didnt touch anything without permission. the only time i will ever touch someone without their permission is to tap them on the shoulder to ask them for a hug, picture or to look closely at a costume piece.

one thing i do want to get across is LOTS of kids there have ADD/ADHD and they are real disorders, so dont get too mad.

Furries are intersting people, and to each their own, right?

And I wouldn't be surprised if they were the ones to create "glomping."


Will have to say though, most anyone likes a nice tight hug...